Joseph Onesta
Just a bit of my story...
Just a bit of my story...
All rights reserved.
In some ways, my personal testimony means nothing. On the other hand, you may
want to know who I am and what I am about.
Raised in a Catholic environment, faith always held a strong if not central position in my life. I always had a
sense of destiny and purpose in life and that sense was a fruit of my fledgling relationship with God. In college
I had an experience that made Jesus very real to me and it wasn't much later that I experienced the Holy Spirit
in the way many Pentecostals and Charismatic Catholics do and I joined a small full-gospel church with a very
powerful pastor/teacher and the most amazing worship services I had ever experienced. Between my college
fellowship and my church, I received more biblical education than many do in bible college.
Eventually, my career and acquaintance with a Church in the Bronx, took me to New York City. On Easter Day I
was ordained in that Church. My ordination was really an amazing thing. Standing before the congregation as
the elders hurled questions at me and everyone reacting to my responses. Then the agreement of everyone
that I and one of my brothers named Willy were accepted as ministers. The power of the laying on of hands
and prayer and sense of destiny were wonderful.
All along the way, I struggled with my sexual orientation. As a child I fought it because I feared being sick or
deranged as was the diagnosis back then. As I grew up, I vehemently denied and avoided homosexual
inclination and contact because I knew it would only exacerbate the daily harassment, teasing and bullying I
received. As a man of God, I confessed, renounced, prayed, hand healing and laying on of hands. I pleaded
with God to remove it. Thinking this was my cross to bare or my equivalent to Paul's thorn, was inconceivable.
God promised in 1 John 1:9 that if I confessed my sin he would certainly forgive me and he would cleanse me
of unrighteousness. Eventually, I went on a kind of sabbatical to focus my attention on the Lord so that he
could deal with me. I figured that the gay thing had to be some sort of rebellion on my part though I couldn't see
it. I'd seek the Lord and find him and therein would lay my deliverance.
The sabbatical lasted more than 22 years because while I grew in fellowship with the Lord, I am still gay. I
have come to believe God never had any intention of changing my sexuality. It didn't seem to bother him as
much as I thought it should and he wasn't about to validate my ill-conceived doctrine and misconceptions with
a miracle. I've learned that we serve God on his terms, not ours.
There's more, much more but I've had enough of focusing the attention on me. I am dedicated to helping
anyone, gay or straight to find the love, joy and peace I've found in Jesus Christ. It is my purpose to facilitate the
spiritual lives of those whom God sends. If when you read my writing, listen to my talks, or whatever, it help you
to grow in your relationship with God, that is all that matters.
want to know who I am and what I am about.
Raised in a Catholic environment, faith always held a strong if not central position in my life. I always had a
sense of destiny and purpose in life and that sense was a fruit of my fledgling relationship with God. In college
I had an experience that made Jesus very real to me and it wasn't much later that I experienced the Holy Spirit
in the way many Pentecostals and Charismatic Catholics do and I joined a small full-gospel church with a very
powerful pastor/teacher and the most amazing worship services I had ever experienced. Between my college
fellowship and my church, I received more biblical education than many do in bible college.
Eventually, my career and acquaintance with a Church in the Bronx, took me to New York City. On Easter Day I
was ordained in that Church. My ordination was really an amazing thing. Standing before the congregation as
the elders hurled questions at me and everyone reacting to my responses. Then the agreement of everyone
that I and one of my brothers named Willy were accepted as ministers. The power of the laying on of hands
and prayer and sense of destiny were wonderful.
All along the way, I struggled with my sexual orientation. As a child I fought it because I feared being sick or
deranged as was the diagnosis back then. As I grew up, I vehemently denied and avoided homosexual
inclination and contact because I knew it would only exacerbate the daily harassment, teasing and bullying I
received. As a man of God, I confessed, renounced, prayed, hand healing and laying on of hands. I pleaded
with God to remove it. Thinking this was my cross to bare or my equivalent to Paul's thorn, was inconceivable.
God promised in 1 John 1:9 that if I confessed my sin he would certainly forgive me and he would cleanse me
of unrighteousness. Eventually, I went on a kind of sabbatical to focus my attention on the Lord so that he
could deal with me. I figured that the gay thing had to be some sort of rebellion on my part though I couldn't see
it. I'd seek the Lord and find him and therein would lay my deliverance.
The sabbatical lasted more than 22 years because while I grew in fellowship with the Lord, I am still gay. I
have come to believe God never had any intention of changing my sexuality. It didn't seem to bother him as
much as I thought it should and he wasn't about to validate my ill-conceived doctrine and misconceptions with
a miracle. I've learned that we serve God on his terms, not ours.
There's more, much more but I've had enough of focusing the attention on me. I am dedicated to helping
anyone, gay or straight to find the love, joy and peace I've found in Jesus Christ. It is my purpose to facilitate the
spiritual lives of those whom God sends. If when you read my writing, listen to my talks, or whatever, it help you
to grow in your relationship with God, that is all that matters.
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